Another breakup, another chance at marriage missed, another supposedly great love that said goodbye. Professionally, things are trickling along more badly than well, the big career leap has still not happened, and so nothing came of my Louboutins either. That is what my life looks like right now. More than boring. So I decided to give my life some momentum and kill two birds with one stone. I will become a millionaire's wife. I only have one single hurdle left to clear: How do you become a millionaire's wife?
First of all, you should of course spend time where millionaires hang out. And I mean events for high society, not the red-light district. I thought the movie "Pretty Woman" was quite nice, but I do not really believe the same will happen to me. To advance the project "How do you become a millionaire's wife," I now ask Google about events near me. Events do take place, but most of them can only be attended with a personal invitation or a ticket for the VIP area. For a working-class woman like me, unaffordable. So a new plan is needed. Maybe for the "How do you become a millionaire's wife" enterprise I do not need to attend an expensive event, but just the after-show party. A little drink at a bar could help there. Of course I must not look like some country bumpkin; no millionaire wants a woman who is not presentable in public. So I jot down a little list of how to whip my appearance into shape.

How do you become a millionaire's wife - to-do list:

  • Hair salon visit
  • Manicure
  • Pedicure
  • New outfit

How do you become a millionaire's wife? - With a new look!

After I have ticked off everything on the list, I can launch the project "How do you become a millionaire's wife" and head to a bar. Judging by online reviews, you can find especially many attractive, wealthy men here. Two hours later I am already on my way home. Somehow I must have misread the reviews, because neither attractive nor wealthy men hang out in this bar. Who would have thought that the project "How do you become a millionaire's wife" would be such a difficult undertaking.

How do you become a millionaire's wife


Since I now have to write off two options as failures, I consult the World Wide Web. I type in "How do you become a millionaire's wife". There are endless tips, from gold-digger school to the adult entertainment industry. Fake breasts, fake lips, an unnaturally tight face. My hair appointment was apparently not enough after all. Looking at these women, I might give it another try with Frank. And as for the millions: I think I will play the lottery.